Where's the Funny?

A lot of funny stuff emerged during a conversation with some of my best buddies recently. And some of it is really comedy that would not make it to the Real Heavyweight Comedy show which has become a Monte Casino feature.

A friend told me that one of the funniest jokes he can tell is that there has been a reduction of suicide bombings in Baghdad. One should remember that there was once a time that the family of a suicide bomber was rewarded with mint dollars.

So my friend said that the reduction in suicide bombings are a result of the global economic crunch. “I’m telling you my friend the Sheiks who have been bankrolling the bombings, then rolling out moolah to the families of the martyrs are feeling the pinch and have started economizing. I should confess I didn’t find it funny though.

Here’s another one which was supposed to be funny about JZ’s socialista daughter Dudu. My friend put his balls on the guillotine that if the first daughter does not grace one of the following magazine titles, DRUM, MOVE, BONA and some other softer and darker version of FEMINA he will not resist castration. Well, this is not funny but true.

Then another friend told me that given that Akon has been given the license to sing the theme song to our very own FIFA 2010 World Cup, he has heard that some less-fortunate local musos have been complaining that he is a foreigner and they should have been contacted.

That had us thinking; what is the most famous sports song do you know? Mine is the UEFA ‘These are the Champions’ which was played to the bone on Wednesday during the Italian Massacre.
Then the next one has got to be ‘Chariot of Fire’ which gets played everytime at the pinnacle of an athletic event. They are timeless.

Now remember the last time Bafana-Bafana had a song to cheer them on? That very forgetful ‘Bafana-Bafana siya-wena (pronounced venah – as in win). Now can you trust such unskilled bunch of gospel and kwaito musicians to compose something of classical proportions to rival the UEFA and athletics theme songs? No ways.

On a final note can someone please tell me what is the justification of having Khanyi Mbau in any newspaper? I mean for the life of me her only claim to fame is having enticed Mandla to marry her, be stupid enough to have a baby by her, buy her a Lamboghini, rent out a penthouse at Michaelangelo and exhaust his budget.

Why anyone would put her on their ‘to do’ list beats me. Okay, add to that the fact that she’s not the most beautiful thing on Prada.

Okay, that wasn’t funny. It was never meant to be.